What Does Your Facebook Profile Photo Say About You?

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1.       Arty/Instagram/Hipster
 I’m so hipster I barely even use Facebook, but when I do I make sure its so everyone knows how individual I am. I did a photo shoot with my Canon rebel ti3, for my new clothing line which is a mix of religious iconography with a retro vibe. Think Fresh Prince . Colour is so mainstream, so I used Instagram to show off my original side. The camera, covering my face, represents post-ironic symbolism juxtaposed with a modernist indifference on a backdrop of trees embodying my minimalist lifestyle. I hope no one realises my dress is actually from Urban Outfitters, and not from a charity shop in Headingley.
2.       Gap Yah
 I travelled south-east Asia last year, barefoot in fact, on a spiritual, existentialist and spirituo-existentialistic pursuit of the meaning of life. To accompany me, I had only my pet tiger, Ghandi Junior, seen here. My trip would not have been complete without volunteering at an orphanage in Bangkok for two hours, something I found hugely rewarding. It was after all a pursuit of happiness, to be at one with myself. I was fortunate enough to build bridges, both metaphorical and real ones with the local community, a truly humbling experience.
3.       Mirror Selfie/Duck face
Today I just thought I looked too good and I needed to document it. Sometimes I forget Facebook isn’t Myspace. Not wanting to be seen as vain, I used the traditional ‘duck face’ to give it a humourous twist, but really I think it’s a flattering look as it gives me a really defined jawline and model like cheekbones. The nonchalant ‘bored at home’ caption was a way of pretending that I was actually busy. What this photo doesn’t tell you is I simply had nothing to do that day, except dress up in my newest favourite outfit.
4.       Macho
‘I’m sexy and I know it’, at least that’s what I sing to myself when i’m taking pictures. Hey ladies, this is me in my natural habitat. Just got back from the gym and wanted to show off my hard work. Walking around my house semi-naked, i thought i just looked too good for anyone to miss out on. I found myself shirtless in front of the bathroom mirror and after a few hundred takes of me flexing with an ambient light, decided this was a winner. I then sat back and waited for my admirers to like it.
5.       Coupley
Without a doubt he’s the one for me. Just incase you aren’t sick of our pda sessions in the Edward Boyle, this photo shows what you’re missing out on. I added the caption ‘Kevin, I met you two weeks ago and became the happiest girl alive, I love you so much’ because why would I say that to him in person when there is Facebook? I hope all my friends don’t get too jealous of the burning love we have for each other and my incredible luck to have found this man.
6.       Party/girls holiday
Last summer I went to Malia with the girls (love you xxx), and we drank so much I can barely even remember the holiday, except I can. We were on it EVERY night, it was epic. This is my favourite photo from all 600, which I had to use 3 albums for. OMG it was unreal when sarah vommed in her handbag, jo went skinny dipping in the fountain and Misha traded her knickers for free drinks. We’ve already booked for next year, Malia 2k13! Best holiday everrrrr.
Conclusion
At the end of the day, we’re all guilty of at least one of these. Your profile picture tells the world what you want them to think of you. So, during your final year, when applying for graduate jobs, you might find yourself taking down the one of you strawpedo-ing a bottle of wine and replacing it with a more sophisticated subdued photo from your cousins wedding, before the reception that is. Fair play if you want to show off the holiday of a lifetime or your toned abs, but the duck face will never be socially acceptable. Probably best not to put anything up you wouldn’t want your own Grandma to see.

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