Ladies and gentleman I do not hope to alarm you but just the other day, I bit the bullet and went on my first ever Tinder date. It was in Kent. At home. Where I LIVE.
Let’s recap on the Tinder phenomemon quickly: Users in your area pop up for your consideration, swipe left or right, then when that little ego boost occurs, start chatting, meet up, hook up or just block them again. Anything goes. It’s simple, and i’m ashamed to say, so very addictive! Varying stories of lads who over-Tindered and ran out of suggestions, the banning of “Tindering at the Table” and the creation of “Tindering on the Toilet” (alright that last one is just my personal preference on when to have a quick look) show how popular it’s been with the student masses. In a huge city like Leeds you swipe through without too much thought and occasionally enjoy the odd fragmented conversation or well thought out chat-up line “fancy a go?” Nothing too scary, nothing too serious. Personally I’d say i’ve only had any real chit chat with about every 1 in 5 guys I’ve “matched” with. Head home ladies and that figure goes straight through the roof. I’m talking EVERY. SINGLE. ONE.
It could very well be down to the fact that Kent isn’t exactly the most happening of places, and branching out and meeting new potential love interests is quite difficult, but back home, anyone I absent-mindedly swiped right, was straight in touch and very chatty. Fine, nice enough, quite flattering, I’ll take it. This is all well and good until you realise, that somehow, the guy you’re not sure about has somehow convinced you to squeeze in an hour’s date with him inbetween visiting your family, or they’ve been round your house before because they are friends with your little sister, or strangely their Tinder has stopped working so they’ve tracked you down on Facebook and started trying to chat you up there. All separate examples, all happened to me within a weekend. Kent is clearly very boring. My first ever Tinder date, which I went along on in a leap of blind faith and because actually, if I’ve survived long coach journeys before, with people who make me want to suffocate myself with my own hat, I can probably live through a gin or two with a stranger, right? I went ahead, did it, didn’t get abducted and had a nice enough time. No harm done. But ladies, Heed these warnings!
Don’t swipe ANYONE at home unless they look to be very much your type.
Avoid anyone who is younger than you and has one of your siblings as a mutual friend.
But equally don’t meet anyone with no mutual friends. That’s a bit weird and not worth the risk. Who knows who will turn up?!
DON’T expect any lad with an Instagram profile picture to actually look that way.
If he’s a bit older than you but you think “hey it’s okay, he looks to be a young 25,” just stop it. His pictures are a bit older, just like him and you will be getting a shock when you meet him. Trust me on this one.
As a general rule of thumb, I’ve found Tinder to be a bit of fun and provides me with an exciting bit of eye candy when i’m hangin’ hard. (Bonus points if you appear to go skiing or snowboarding in any of your pictures. My best friend forces me to swipe you right automatically on grounds of ‘compatible lifestyles’)
In a big city it’s a great way to search out no-strings attached fun, but be warned when using it at home ladies, these lads want to date you properly, and they won’t take no for an answer.