Wearing a fanny pack comes with a lot of baggage. People snigger, stare and try to claim it’s merely a short-lived hipster trend.Bum bag wearers(or waist bag) for the prudes, I salute you. We are sensible, stylish and street savvy. Festivalgoers, clubbers, German tourists and dog walkers, let us unite against the cynics. Let us bask without fear of reprisal in the era of what will soon be known as The Bum Bag Renaissance.
My fanny pack is no joke. The bum bag renaissance has given new life to this bygone 80s trend, and over the years these ergonomic fashion choices have taken the high fashion runways (and Beaverworks) by storm- just ask Karl Lagerfeld. No longer associated with perms, shoulder pads and parachute trousers the bum bag now exists as its own entity. The bag enriches the lives of its loyal wearers yet is constantly plagued by the criticisms of detractors who just don’t get it. If you’re into utilitarianism- then the fanny pack is the bag for you. Even Oscar winning thespian Matthew McConaughey, had to defend his right to wear a fanny pack to reporter Julia Morales; he said”I’m not afraid of the fanny pack, you gotta kind of put it on the side to make it look a little, not as nerdy. But still, practicality wins out.”He added, “I’ve got so much gear in here that I don’t want in my pockets.”Rightly said, Matthew. No matter who you are, the fanny pack will make your life just that little bit easier. Once you buy a pack, you don’t go back.
The bum bag has become the butt of the joke. Remember when everyone made fun of a middle parting? Look where we are now. Just because I brought my black leather strappy number from Blue Rinse and it still contains Amsterdam Metro tickets from 2008 in the secret pocket does not detract from its utility and it looks damn chic. Nowadays with iPhones taking over the world, everyone is heading out with a small fortune loose in their pockets. The fanny pack is basically pickpocket-proof, drunk-proof but not critic-proof. All they’ve ever done is keep your belongings safe when you can’t even look after yourselves.
We’ve all accepted the return of the 90s crop top, which is arguably one of the least sensible/accessible fashion choices to grace the high street. Why is everyone still hating on the bum bag wearers? There’s nothing funny about the fanny pack and its not just something to buy last minute for a festival- it is a lifestyle choice. You can literally let go of your inhibitions, wave your hands in the air like you just don’t care, without fear of lassoing a fellow club goer or sending your mini handbag spiraling off into the distance. Bum bags have got your back.
So, so long pockets! The Bum Bag Renaissance is nigh. With IPhones getting bigger and bigger the bum bag is the only real choice to accommodate them. So when the world is ready, The Rock, Matthew McConaughey and myself will all be saying we told you so.