Roses are red, violets are blue, it’s gonna be ok, these films are here for you

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Valentine’s Day can be a minefield. Sure, a nice film night sounds like a good safe idea, but what vibe are you going for here? Are you three years into a nice comfortable relationship that’s only slightly boring like your old sweater, or are you currently living in the world of No Boys Allowed, drinking wine by the bucket with your best mates? Not to worry, Arts have got you sorted:

For You & Your Significant Other:


One of the critically acclaimed LGBTQ movies to rise out of 2015. With Rooney Mara and Cate Blanchet taking the lead roles as Therese Belivet and Carol Aird, set in the 1950s the film deals with what you can only describe as instantaneous magnetism between two people. Yes, both of the leading characters are women but they are tied to men at the beginning of the film. If anything, this film presents love in its purest form. The imagery is elusive, the time-period exemplifies the powers of love and it’s just an all-round ‘I’m in love with love’ fest – perfect for all of you couples out there.

No Strings Attached

Would it be Valentines without us recommending a film that involves the ‘let’s just keep it physical’ motif? No. Would it be Valentines if you didn’t watch a film which is rooted in the idea that there’s one person you have a connection? Someone who just kept cropping back up in your life? No. Are you with that person now? Yes? Then enter, No Strings Attached. It’s the underrated version of Friends With Benefits and the woman (Natalie Portman) is in control of feelings for once, win.

For You & Your Pals:

The Other Woman

This film reminded me of that bond you forge in five seconds at the girl’s toilets on a night out, but on a slightly bigger scale. Wife (Leslie Mann), the other woman (Cameron Diaz) and the other other woman (Kate Upton) all team up to bring down the demise of what can only be described as a scumbag. Considering we all like to complain about fuck boys, let us rejoice in a film which takes down the fuck boys left, right and centre. Also note that Nicki Minaj’s cameo as Diaz’s assistant will have you and your mates howling.

King Cobra

To be honest this is a complete raunch-fest centring on everyone’s true love: James Franco, but of the gay variety. It’s an autobiographical crime-drama about the rise and fall (or murder) of porn star Brent Corrigan. It is 100% lemons, and by that I mean all smut and absolutely no soul. The word ‘twinks’ is thrown around, but in context it is the film to watch if you and your friends hate Valentine’s day and just want to plunge in to something slightly darker.

For You & Your Tub of Ben and Jerry’s/Bottle of Wine ( same):

Waiting To Exhale

If you want female empowerment at its finest, then you need to watch Angela Basset set her husband’s BMW on fire over and over again. Waiting To Exhale is a wonderful story about four strong black women, and it’s refreshing to know that such a film is currently out there in such turbulent times. We’ve all been there with partners we’d love to get our own back on from the self-absorbed to the unfaithful. This is the movie for you, now get out of bed, put that ben & jerry’s spoon down and do your thing.

The Lobster

Because if you’re single you’ll love a black comedy on Valentines. Imagine Colin Farrell having 45 days to find a partner otherwise he’ll turn in to an animal, that’s basically the premise of the entire movie… I’d have turned in to a pug approximately six months ago. He also chooses to become a lobster if the 45 days passes without finding himself a mate inside of the hotel. A lobster. Just let that sink in, all the animals in the world and he chooses a lobster? Anyway, as hilarious as the premise is, it does have that dark edge that you seek as a long term singleton.  Do it.

Rianna Julian

(Image courtesy of Paramount)

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