New Crispys to open in the Union

An anonymous source has said told the Pigeon that a new franchise of Crispys will be opening in the Union sometime late next year, 2018.

The much beloved greasy takeaway on the corner of Woodhouse and Hyde Park is a favourite of intoxicated students looking to fill their burger, nug and chip fixes. In daylight the part club part ‘restaurant’ is regularly seen to be empty, raising concerns about the popularity of the new store whilst patrons are sober and can see daylight.

The opening follows Humpit opening up a space as part of the union upgrade.

Second year biochemist Teodora Maria was ecstatic about the news saying “sometimes when I’m in the library at 3am I really fancy a Crispys but can’t find the will to walk to Hyde Park then back again, this solves everything!”

At this time the owners could not be reached for comment with nothing confirmed officially. But we trust our sources.