If you covered me in olive oil, put me in a room full of moist balloons and told me to hold on to as many as I could, I would have a better grasp of my surroundings than some of my fellow liberals do today.
I seem to have missed some sort of meeting. At what point did we start campaigning for old art we don’t like to be removed? When did we decide that a joke we were offended by should result in trial by social media? And most importantly: why on earth did we decide that these were the hills we were going to die on?
Every great liberal reformer has had two abilities; prioritisation and pragmatism. Today these are too often surpassed by moral hysteria and virtual grandstanding. As Bill Maher pointed out after Donald Trump’s election: “while you self-involved fools were policing language at the Kids’ Choice Awards, a madman talked his way into the White House.”
— Raf Bagdasarian (@raffibag) January 28, 2017
There are so many important battles to be won and yet we choose to fight the ones where, quite frankly, it’s not clear we’re the protagonist. Sorry gang, but the jury is out on provocative art and comedy. These are subjective; they’re not climate change or workers’ rights. Can’t we all just put down our mason jars and stop being offended for one second so we can actually do something?
And before any tighty far righty’s rally in behind me you can all shove off. Your glee in engaging with liberals in the debates I’ve mentioned is only a distraction from the fact you’re impoverishing the disabled and treating homeless people like vermin. But I digress.
The saddest thing about all of this is that these words will have no effect. Because those who believe that they hold the moral high-ground have gone past the point of introspection.
So now I’m just sitting here, covered in olive oil, shouting into the internet like the rest of you balloons.
Photo credit: https://www.themedicalfacts.com/medical-science-explains-effects-single-cup-coffee-body/