The Death of the Meet-Cute: Does Anyone Meet By Chance Nowadays?
Ruby Britton discusses how romantic encounters have been replaced by dating apps.
Image Credit: MGM
Once upon a time, in a faraway land (before the creation of Tinder), romance started as a chance encounter: bumping into each other on the streets, spilling a cup of coffee, or in the instance of Callum Turner and Dua Lipa, finishing the same chapter of the same book at the same time (so happy for them…honestly). These moments are precious, rare and the sole reason Amazon Prime keeps churning out endless rom-coms. However, in our digital age dominated by dating apps, have we lost the ability to have that magic moment?
In recent years, dating apps have become an increasingly significant part of our society. Nowadays, it’s more common to hear that your friend met the person that they’re dating on Hinge, rather than the classic “locking eyes across a crowded room”. Of course, it’s not all bad – there are definitely some positive factors to online dating: for those with smaller circles, it can be a lifeline, giving them the opportunity to meet people they perhaps wouldn’t have met in real life.
In lieu of this, we must also take into account the negatives that come along with online dating. With every mindless scroll and swipe, the idea of romance seems to fade away a little more. Some may say that these apps make finding a partner easier – I say they’re a cop out. The constant cycle of swiping encourages us to value appearance over true connection, reducing people to prompts and photographs rather than personalities.
As dating apps make it easier than ever to ‘meet’ people through a screen, they have also made real-life approaches seem almost unfeasible. It’s safe to say that people are more likely to shy away from going up to someone in a bar when they can instead send a like (or a rose if you’re feeling bold) and avoid potential rejection. Why risk humiliation when you can hide behind the safety of your phone?
“In losing the art of the approach, we are also losing the art of conversation.”
Truthfully, there is a strong fear of rejection amongst young adults. We have grown up in an era where everything has been digitalised, facilitated by iPhones, and as a result we have forgotten how to communicate without a filter. On top of this, there is also the added concept of not knowing how to approach someone, for fear of being too forward or awkward. In losing the art of the approach, we are also losing the art of conversation. Being too scared or nervous to even talk to someone means missing out on creating genuine connections – not just romantically, but socially and emotionally too. The ability to have a simple, fleeting conversation with a stranger is a way in which we can build upon confidence. If we are constantly waiting for notifications, we risk missing out on opportunities.
Really, there is no shame in using dating apps, for they have undoubtedly generated some love stories. But just because you can use them doesn’t necessarily mean you should. Be bold and unapologetic with your feelings and bring back spontaneity. After all, what’s the worst that can happen?